You too, Me too? - Sunfeast Biscuits

You too, me too?

-          Sunfeast Biscuits

Two toddlers are playing together in a park. They have been identified for some good-natured fun.

One of the toddlers is given Sunfeast Biscuits while the other, nothing. Naturally, one cries while the other instinctively hugs his just-acquired possession.

 The adults instruct him to do the good thing and to share. 

The boy who refused to share, breaks one biscuit into small pieces and gives his friend a tiny piece and on being nudged by the elders, a hug and kiss.  After all what are friends for, no?

The other looks with some confusion at his small piece of biscuit and wails loudly, pointing at his friend’s big packet, all of which is recorded and uploaded on YouTube. (Dear me!)

The day is saved when an adult gives him a packet of Sunfeast Biscuits and tells them to be friends again.

Now they are equals. As moist eyes dry, they kiss and make up.

 But no, no adults, please. Adults are nothing but a bane in a toddler’s simple and uncomplicated life, no?

Because some hotels serve canned food, quite naturally

Because some hotels serve canned food, quite naturally

-          Some hotel in India!

Some hotel in India:

Ruchika has just come down from her room for breakfast. She is targeted for some good-natured fun by the management of the hotel.

She summons the waiter and without even a cursory glance at the menu she tells him that she would like baked beans on toast and a glass of orange juice.

The waiter notes it down and leaves.

Shortly thereafter a chef comes and showing her two branded cans of baked beans asks her which one of the two brands she would prefer? A  much bewildered guest defers to the chef’s better  judgement. 

The waiter proceeds to fill her glass from a one -litre carton of canned orange juice..

After her breakfast, the discontented guest is shown the bill for her to sign. Justifiably, she is upset at having to pay an astronomically high bill for something that by the chef’s own admission is canned food available at the kirana store.

Unable to express her mounting unhappiness, the guest agrees to pay the amount... but not without a show of unhappy discontent, all of which is recorded and uploaded on YouTube. (Oh, dear!)

At length when she is about to leave, she is told that a joke was played on her and as a token of regret for the inconvenience caused, would she like to have her lunch on the house?

A much delighted guest has a sumptuous spread for lunch during the course of which she is treated most attentively by polite and considerate waiters. 

She carries home with her a delightful tale of friendly service and excellent food, something that she will remember for a long, long time...

Life mein kabhie kabhie - Pepsi - 2

Life mein kabhie kabhie kuch na kuch achcha hota hai - 2

-          Pepsi

It’s a bright and sunny April morning here in Chennai. Temperatures are soaring high as the city gears itself for another month of scorching heat.

And with soaring temperatures can frayed tempers be far behind? 

Anxious parents with their 12^th standard nail-chewing wards swarm the school’s bulletin board like bees to honey to get a better view of the results.

A lone Pepsi vendor polishes the table top as if in anticipation of celebrations for some and tears of sorrow for the rest that he predicts will follow.

The results are put up on the board. There’s a mad scramble, and heads over heads are jostling against one another for space.

There are shrieks of laughter as tears of joy well up from brimming eyes of pretty girls and gallant boys. 

This calls for a celebration. 

Wards and parents treat other happy wards and parents to ice-filled glasses of Pepsi. There is mayhem in the stall and idle chatter with happy exchanges of marks.

Amidst the babble of the geese and the gander is the lone duckling with her dejected parents in tow about to climb onto the scooter to ride a tired journey home.

The bleak story is not lost on the ever watchful gaze of the Pepsi boy who saunters across with tall glasses of icy Pepsi and gives the family a treat on the house.

A fleeting moment of sheer happiness dispels the sorrow as the ice-filled, sweetened dark liquid washes down parched throats.

And happiness overflows at knowing that they do not have to pay a farthing for it, unlike the others.

Sometimes you win, sometimes you lose, isn’t that right, Pepsi?

It’s true: Life mein kabhie kabhie kuch na kuch achcha hota hai!

(In life sometimes, something good always happens!)

ICICI Cards - The 'penalties' of being loyal

ICICI Cards - The ‘penalties’ of being loyal

A loyal and conscientious patron of ICICI Cards is identified for some good-natured fun.

The phone rings. It is from the office of the manager of ICICI Cards who rather ominously verifies that she indeed is Ms. Gupta, and as she is, that her presence is needed at the manager’s office today.  A confused Ms. Gupta says she will be at the office right away.

Ms. Gupta makes her way to the reception of the credit card division of the bank. There are a lot of people each being pulled up and questioned harshly by an executive. Ms. Gupta finds herself at the tail end of the long and winding queue.

After what seems to be an eon it is the turn of the by now very nervous and troubled customer. The executive without looking at her tells her rather brusquely to wait outside the manager’s office. By the time she finds out where the manager is in the new and immaculate environment, she finds herself at the end of another long queue. At length she is called in.

She waits anxiously. The manager rudely barks orders at the staff and tells them not to disturb him. Ms. Gupta is visibly agitated wringing her handkerchief around her fingers.

 The man turns to her and tells her of payments not being paid on time and spells out grave consequences of not doing so.

Her nervous protestations to the contrary and much else is recorded and uploaded on YouTube.

All of a sudden he breaks into a smile and says that but she need not worry as she has been selected by the division as one of the division’s most loyal and conscientious customers.

 A beaming manager further wonders aloud how she would feel if she was to find that she is eligible to upgrade to the next level – the Sapphiro range of cards. He further requests her to accept as a token of appreciation a one-day’s ride around anywhere in the city on a BMW, with best compliments from ICICI  Credit Cards.

A happy and much relieved Ms. Gupta returns home in a BMW knowing that this is the kind of an experience that she will remember for a long, long time...

Let's strike a deal; a receipt printer from TVS-E

Let’s strike a deal; but first a receipt printer from TVS-E

A busy street in Chennai:

TVS-E has identified this street to be notoriously stubborn in not automating their shops, despite TVS – E’s persistent requests to buy it, considering the benefits of having a receipt printer in their shops are many.

The proprietor of Jyothi Shoppe, Sri Ahmed, a respected member of the traders here in Lakshmipuram, has been identified for a prank all in good nature in connivance with... good grief, the consumers!

At the crack of dawn, the sun has yet to have risen, but walkers fill the street in their bid to be the first to catch a whiff of fresh air in Besant Nagar’s Elliot’s Beach. But first, a local newspaper and a single cigarette or a little something for wifey, dearest...

But, what’s this? There is already a crowd at Ahmed’s store, each walker haranguing for the good man’s undivided attention?

Ahmed yells for more help on the double. His wife hurries back with the news that his son is sick and his daughter has to attend school. His wife, and his brother, split the work between them while Ahmed personally manages the money transactions.

Soon there is a labyrinthine queue outside his stall inconveniencing those visiting other shops in the vicinity.

The dawn gives way to light with no let up in the traffic to his shop (Strange...?)

... And there is a growing sense of discontent among the consumers some of whom leave in search of shops with better and quicker service. (Considering his service is the best, make that a double strange...)

Sensing the growing frustration in her good husband, the wife laments the day he turned the TVS –E salesman away. The shopkeeper’s woeful regret and much else is recorded and uploaded on YouTube.

Suddenly, a salesman pops out from nowhere and asks the proprietor if he would reconsider his decision and buy a printer... (Huh?)

 It could save him time and more importantly bring in more customers, no?  (Hmm...)

And perhaps he could convince his comrades on either side of the street to join him for a demo...?

(Alright, now, out with it. What’s going on?)

The salesman tells him of the prank pulled on him by TVS-E and that there was an irresistible offer for the inconvenience caused, with best compliments from TVS-E. And, oh, all the customers were, by the way, staged. So...

 The sporting proprietor promises to get back to him by the same evening, assured in the knowledge that his efforts will not be in vain. And what’s more, he gets to keep a cool receipt printer at a fraction of the price for his efforts with best compliments from TVS – E.

What you possess, others covet - Nokia

What you possess, others covet

-          Nokia

Somewhere in a suburb of Chennai:

A young girl saunters into a Univercell store with a friend in tow. She has been the targeted for a good-natured prank by the management of the store and Nokia.

The girl desires to buy a smartphone that quite naturally has all the features.

Quite naturally, the salesman shows her seven different and popular mobile brands with the exact features. 

Do you have any one brand in mind, asks the salesman helpfully?

The bewildered child vaguely asks for a popular brand with “all the features”.

 The wily salesman says he has just the product that she is looking for. He reaches out for several phones of different brands. A couple have five of the features she is looking for while the rest of the features are available in the other brands. He wonders that perhaps she would like him to pack them all? 

While the girl is consulting with her friend, the salesman smiles mischievously and hands her the bill for all the mobiles, the amount of which is astronomical, to say the least, considering that they are all popular smartphones.

Bewilderment mounts to consternation as the girl realises that she has been duped into buying so many phones that she did not even recollect committing to! (Oh, dear!) 

Trembling with anger, she demands to speak with the manager. All of this and much else is recorded and uploaded on YouTube! (Oh, dear!) (Make that, oh, dear!²)

The girl’s hysteria would have made her breathless for want of air had it not been for the manager who sprung out from she knew not where!

She is gently told of the joke that was played on her and would she be so kind as to accept the Nokia at a fraction of the original price, with best compliments from Nokia?

 And oh, yes, all the accessories that she would like are on the house!

The girl walks out with her friend a proud owner of Nokia Asha 300.

 Now wouldn’t her pals at school turn green with envy at the ‘prized catch’ and that too at such a bargain and in the manner that she had just received?

What’s it they say, what you possess others covet? 

So true, indeed, don’t you think?